Friday, August 26, 2011


You may remember me mentioning that I had a toe problem. It started as a running injury and went very wrong (it's the "ring" toe on my right foot, the little piggy that doesn't get any roast beef). It was a big ordeal- nasty, painful, and a mystery to all medical professionals. Eventually the amazing Dr Jill Jackson-Smith told me it was a wart. Which I really didn't want to admit to people, because I think warts are gross. We did a round of a topical treatment- no dice. We did a round of cantharone (blister venom)- no dice. More topical medicine- no dice. Then Dr Jill had me take a high dosage of dry Vitamin A and zinc. Within a week there was a remarkable difference. It was a miracle. And here is my toe today, almost totally healed.

Aren't feet weird?

Also, I started reading the book Go Dairy Free by Alisa Marie Fleming. I highly suggest this book to anyone needing to go dairy free. Or anyone at all, really. I have been annoying my family all night with texts if dairy facts I find fascinating.

Something the book discusses is some of the sneaky names of dairy or sneaky places it can hide. For example:

That's right- the calcium supplement I take because I an't digest milk contains milk. Really???? How aggravating and interesting at the same time.

I think I am about to get pretty radical with eliminating dairy from my diet. I am tired of the side effects.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Wednesday, August 24, 2011


I've been thinking a lot lately about healing.  I've been waiting for my ankle to heal and waiting for my heart to heal.

My walking shoes

My child, be attentive to my words; incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them escape from your sight; keep them within your heart. For they are life to those who find them, and healing to all their flesh.- Proverbs 4:20-22

Life can get pretty rough.  We live in this fallen, awful world.  We try to do our best (most of the time) and we still end up hurt. 

I've been pondering the ways we get through our grief.  How do we find hope, comfort, peace?

Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress; he sent out his word and healed them, and delivered them from destruction. Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wonderful works to humankind.- Psalm 107:19-21

I found this quote on
"You will lose someone you can’t live without,and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp." Anne Lamott

I love this quote.  Love, love, love.  It speaks straight into my soul.

I've also been thinking about rehab.  No, not the kind the late Amy Winehouse sang about.  I've been sittting around on my lame ankle waiting for it to heal itself.  I've ignored it and ran rough on it, which made it worse.  When that didn't work I braced it up and babied it for awhile, which kept my pain at the same level.  Next I decided "Oh, screw it" and ran on it.  Which made it worse again.

The heart is the same way.  I've ignored the grievances in my heart, pushed them to the side.  Or I've pushed too hard, determined to heal myself and get through it.

I need a physical therapist for my heart...I need to admit my failings and pride and allow God to come in and perform some rehab for me. 

Why do I think I can do it myself?  Why do I resist asking the only one who can help to help?

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Girls Gone Wild

A friend of mine pointed out that I didn't really "live it up" while my husband was gone.  I guess I wasted most of my time being miserable and missing him and forgot that it was my time to go crazy!  Ok, maybe not so much crazy...but I should have.  So now that he's going to be home in 9 days, I decided to have a girls' night with some of my family.  (In the top picture is his cousin, his sister's sister-in-law, his cousin's wife, his sister, and my sister.  And I'm the first one in the bottom picture.)

We went to Hu Hut, which on the Subway-in-other-food-genres idea.  It's make your own Mongolian stir-fry.  It was good, but I'm not likely to go back super often.  But it was fun to try something new.

After dinner we went back to my house for crafts, nails, and drinks.  It was a much needed time with good girlfriends.

Now I'm realizing my "single" time is about up.  So if there are any fun or wild things I need to do, tell me now!  :)

Friday, August 12, 2011

Knowing a Baby's Gender at 7 Weeks

The above is a link to a blog discussing the new JAMA article regarding non-invasive gender testing that can be done as early as seven weeks in the baby's gestation.  Wow.  That's early.  Many women don't even know that they are pregant at seven weeks.  How amazing it would be to go in for your first doctor's appointment and be told "Congrats, you're preganant, and it's a ______!".  I think it would be cool to immediately begin calling the baby by the right name (if you had decided on a name already) or begin to decorate the nursery.  If a pregnancy happened to end in loss, perhaps it would be easier for some to mourn for a child with a known gender?  (Lee and I decided that our baby was a girl, and that helped us tremendously).  How crazy is this new test?  Of course if I had my way, I wouldn't find out the gender at all until the baby came out, though my planner of a husband would never let that happen.  And I do think it seems kind of fun to have to wait until the baby either gets boy parts or girl parts to know what it is.  So perhaps I wouldn't even take advantage of this new test?

I know that it's been brought up as a great way to find out if further testing is needed.  Since some genetic disorders are more likely to affect one gender over another, I think it would be great to find out what the baby is and possibly avoid further, dangerous testing.

Fetus at Seven Weeks

But... It brings up a lot of controversy.  I'm not usually one to blog about controversial issues, but as my blog isn't that highly read, I feel like I can get away with it.  Also, all of the blogs I have found concerning this subject so far are pro-choice, giving permission to abort the baby based only on gender.

I can't agree with that.  Abortion is a subject that hurts my hard terribly to begin with (remember that I am pro-adoption, believing it to be a Christian duty to take care of the widows and orphans per James 1:27).  I'm not going to argue about abortion or even really speak on it here as not to offend anyone.  But I think that this research would provide more weight behind anti-abortion campaigns as it shows that there is life at conception.  At seven weeks a baby is a boy or a girl.  Not just a faceless fetus, but a child with a gender.  That's amazing.  It just blows my mind.

A lot of the blogs on this subject keep mentioning pro-choice.  That term is hard for me.  Because pro-choice means to me the choice to not have sex, or the choice to have protected sex.  If you remain abstinent, there is no chance of unwanted pregnancy.  If you don't want a baby, don't have sex.  There is a choice.  If you have sex, have protected sex.  Most of the time, this means you won't have a baby.  But sometimes the various forms of birth control fail (especially when used incorrectly).  I guess I just don't understand how "pro-choice" is a good choice.  A good choice for whom?  For the mother?  Because I don't see how the choice is good for the child who is not allowed to be born.

Sometimes I just want to tell people "Don't have an abortion, I'll take your baby."  And that's actually true.  If someone came to me and said "Please take my child or I'll have an abortion" I would do anything possible to get that child for myself or another safe, loving home.  I totally know that some people aren't ready to be parents (though again I say that if you're not ready for the consequence of a baby, don't have sex), some people end up with unwanted pregnancies and simply can't handle it. 

Perhaps I am being naive.  Perhaps my religion is clouding the "rational" part of my brain.  I just don't understand.  Can't understand.  Don't want to understand?

Like I said, I don't want to argue.  Please don't think that I am passing judment or condemning anyone or their choices or beliefs.  This is just a subject that is very close to my heart and very hard for me.  I've written a lot, so I must think I have something to say about it!

What Shoe Are You?

Today at work training I was priviledged to have Lori Randall, Mrs Oklahoma 2002 and Mrs. Christian World 2005, as my guest speaker.  For the first part of our training, Mrs. Randall took us through the "What Shoe Are You?" personality test.  She used shoes to illustrate each of the four personality types- combat boots, house shoes, business shoes, and clown shoes.  I was a pretty good mix of the combat boot and the clown shoes.  I loved such an applicable and visual take on personality typing.

After lunch, Mrs. Randall dove into her own personal story of post-partum depression and psychosis.  Her honesty struck a chord with me and many across the room were crying.  In our society, mental illness or mental "viruses" are still a fairly taboo subject, and I found it empowering for her to tell her tale.  Mrs. Randall showed us how despite, or perhaps because of, her past she reached for her dreams and became a pageant winner and inspirational speaker.

It really struck me hard.  How often I hold myself back... I have so many dreams, but I let life and my own fears and negative self-view keep me from God's blessings.  I am encouraged to spend some time with myself and with God dreaming of my future.  As Belle sings "I want adventure in the great, wide somewhere, I want it more than I can bear, And for once it would be grand, to have someone understand, I want so much more that they've got planned".  We have one who understands, one who has planted the seeds of greatness within us already.  How beautiful to take my desire to serve and be better than myself to the one who created me and ask Him to help me dream big.  Ephesians 3:20 and 21 tells us "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,  to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."  How awesome!  God has even bigger dreams than I do!

And we got to try on her crown! 

When I first got married, I used to wear my wedding tiara every time I did housework.  My poor husband probably wondered what he had gotten himself into.  I keep trying to convince him that I need a new one, but he's not quite sold on the necessity of my request.  Perhaps if I can prove that crystals = faster cleaning?  I'll let you know how that works out for me.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

What It's Worth

The air conditioner at work is broken:

Which led to this being a viable option to beat the 112 degree heat:

Which caused me to seek out a cold dinner, which I rarely, if ever, do. Tonight's dinner had a theme... Dairy and chocolate. Dairy, which I am not allowed to have (bad lactose intolerance, bad) and chocolate, which I probably shouldn't have (bad Katherine, bad).

I ate two bowls of cereal and felt very satisfied. Like deep in my core, let a loud sigh escape, completely satisfied. Yum.

After I ate my cereal and reclined on the living room floor aimlessly browsing through Netflix trying to find a funny tv show to watch, I finally decided to run. I ran on th treadmill in my game room, and it was hot in there!

Here is my mid-run sweaty face:

If my calculations are correct, I did three miles in 32 minutes. Which is about six minutes faster than maybe my math was wrong? (I walked the first .27 miles in 5:07 minutes and then my final time was 37:14 for 3.4 miles).

Post run sweat and delirium:

Tonight was the first run in over a month that felt good. My ankle bothered me a little, but my brain felt clear and my muscles felt loose. This was the first run in soooo long that didn't feel like torture. It reminded me why I like to run. It gave me the push I needed to keep going.

I also tried to do the Ab Ripper X video from P90X. Some day I will make it further than 5 minutes into that video. But today is not that day. Tomorrow's not looking so good either.

Tonight just felt right, you know? Good food, good workout, good company (hey, I am excellent company!). It feels nice to have a spot of peace.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone